“This Totes Sucks”

Totes=totally (just to be clear)

Last Friday I set out for a run thats in my training plan and everything felt A.OK.

I started out with a warm-up walk to the school just like every other time, had my watch ready to go, and I was feeling great.

First step out and my knee popped.

I heard it, felt it, and knew instantly something bad just happened.

Yes, it hurt. But not severely enough to make me question, until I was at 1. 70 miles and I was about to throw up from pain.  I stopped and walked home. It hurt with every step. I got home and suddenly my knee wasn’t in a lot of pain anymore and yes it was somewhat swollen, but not like an alarming size. So I told Zach what happened and brushed it off.

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Brushing it off was a bad idea, because later that night it really hurt to sit down, stand up, or even slightly bend my knee…but walking and all that jazz didn’t hurt one bit. Saturday morning at work, I bent down to get something and it felt as if a knife was carving out my knee. I tried to stand, and yep that same pain was there. I started screaming “no!” in my head. Saturday night I went to my trusty Sweat Pink sisters and they threw out some ideas of what could of been wrong. Majority all said one thing.

Later, it was confirmed what they all thought.

Torn Meniscus.

FML.

I cried like a baby Saturday night. “You keep running, you’ll need surgery. You don’t listen and don’t take a break, you’ll need surgery. Seriously, you need to allow this to heal, or you’ll need surgery.” This only meant one thing, I had to drop out from my half-marathon in October. This meant all that hard work was thrown out the window.  I’m so frustrated. I can deal with bad calf cramps, tight hips, and painful blisters but my left knee has been injured now 3 times, and this makes 2 serious injuries.

Good news is its not that bad, in fact its just moderate. It won’t completely heal, but with a break and plenty of rest it can be tolerable. I found out my body is incredibly weak where it needs to be strong for me to run. My quads, hips, and you guessed it, knees are not strong enough to support me running longer distances. I guess only running is bad. Zach suggested I invest in a running coach and I did. Best decision ever! We are working on getting my body strong, that means a lot of strength training until I can start running again.

I’ve invested in everything mentioned that I will need. That list is an ab core dvd, resistance band loops, and a kettle bell. I’m very excited about this journey that lies ahead of me. This running program is long, and kinda scary. There are not strict paces, more assigned miles to hit in your own time, but with a type of pace. There are drills (?!) and easy runs and of course, long runs.

I know this is a long road to recovery. And I will always be prone to injuries. Especially with this left knee. I have no doubt that sometime in the future I will indeed have to have surgery. Could be the next time or 10 years in the future.

I’m just trying to do whats best for me right now. Its hard to suck it up and accept that your dream is being postponed or that you worked really hard for what feels like nothing. But this for me to be a better runner, to get stronger to allow me to run without hurting myself every couple of months.

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2 thoughts on ““This Totes Sucks”

    • Brooke says:

      Thanks girl! Yes I’m trying to stay positive and look at the long term. But yes the humidity needs to be done! I’m so over it, summer can be done 🙂 I’m ready for fall and fall runs!

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